"I've got a crush.." 💘

Series, Books, Podcasts: everything & anything you should be consuming

Well, hello there, good-lookin!

Welcome the latest #90smusings installment dedicated to my oh so loyal Paid Subscribers😘

Gwyneth Paltrow wore Jeffrey Dahmer glasses, so I got Jeffrey Dahmer glasses.

Kaia Gerber started a book club, so I, too, must start a Book Club, right?

I’ve often said if Mad Men era-Esque Ad agencies still existed-I’d have made a killing. Not because I am a marketing/creative genius (I just want to be able to smoke in the office)

But because I am a willing participant in the allure of “aspirational daydreams,” shall we say. I allow the influence and psychology of pop culture to influence me (to a degree) happily. Lucky for you, I am also anti-establishment, not a good rule follower, and a relentless contrarian.

The flip side is that I often fall in love with something and then constantly go over it with a fine tooth comb and unearth something entirely (more on this tangent to come!)

Anywho! Allow me to share some of these recent “crushes”. Series, music, and books that have been rattling around inside my brain and sent me endless rabbit holes.

Enjoy, dear reader xoxo.

#1 Crush: BEEF

When I first saw this series appear in my Netflix queue, I remember reading the title aloud; (in a very judgemental tone, mind you)

As if I was disgusted by it; the name-which is just plain silly because I’d categorize myself as a devoted carnivore.

Much like the adage “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” the trailer didn’t entice me as much as the story description. Which, to be fair, barely grazes an unmanicured thumbnail across the surface of this dense (but delightful!) layer cake of dark comedy.

Let me also add that the entertainment industry, as of late, seems to have almost forgotten what a dark comedy truly is.

I think creatives, entertainers, writers, and even the world have grown more reluctant to take chances with material that is, at its core, disturbing, upsetting, and uncomfortable. That being said, I think it’s essential to present context and viewpoints from a multitude of lenses-I mean, shock value just to be awful often falls flat.

But not my BEEF. Not even a little bit.

Art by Moi

If you are fond of imperfect people, HI, IT’S ME! I AM ALL THE CHARACTERS

Humans beings humans.

Making their way through the world with the only/best viable tools/options at their disposal.

You are in for a HEAVILY addictive treat. The character development of this talented cast of misfit toys-ebbs and flows in an intimate way that makes you go;

“Oh-I hated (person’s name) 30 seconds ago, but wait-now I get it, and shit, I get that individual’s facade/motivation for things now!”

I haven’t laughed and cried this much since I was told bifocals and a mammogram were most assuredly in my future. I know-I, too, am surprised/blessed to have made it this far.

OH! AND SPOILER ALERT: THERE ARE DICK CHENEY MASKS!

Like, who’s been reading my diary?

Crush #2: BEEF Soundtrack (kind of a given)

The soundtrack to BEEF reads like a dreamy late 90’s early 2000’s WHFS Lineup:

When a beloved 90’s band began to play in the background, I thought, “Hey, now! These writers/producers/directors know just how to set the mood.”

One of my favorites involves the main protagonist, Daniel. We watch Daniel wake in a sun-soaked bed only to roll over with that heavy, almost despondent exhaustion (you know the vibe)

Then-a melodic chime/sparkle (I can’t decide which tonal effect is accurate-use this guide for reference) of an electronic guitar is gifted to the viewer. No words-just that instrumental interlude augmenting this sad yet beautiful moment.

Then the soft reverberation of strings inevitably gives way to the bloom of Smashing Pumpkin’s “Mayonaise.” Chef’s kiss my friends-true chef’s kiss.

This entire soundtrack kept me on my toes; Paula Cole’s infamous Dawson’s Creek theme song, “Machinehead” by Bush, while they're playing a competitive game of basketball made ME (who hated basketball) want to go find a basketball court and embarrass myself.

It’s the kind of soundtrack that had me slump back against my comfy new couch (thanks, Mom) and say aloud.

“Damn”

Crush #3: Anybody Home? Michael J. Seidlinge

If I invited you over to my home anytime between 2008 and 2011, I most definitely forced you to watch The Strangers. Which was pre-Purge movies

And if you were subject to me making you watch the entire film, you know my favorite line because it’s horrifying in its simplicity. When Liv Tyler’s character asks the three masked intruders why they are doing this, one of the masked assailants replies;

“Because you were home.”

Now-I add this little antidote because I had no real idea (which seems silly in retrospect) that home invasions are a lucrative and popular sub-genre in horror.

But it makes sense. It undoubtedly taps into a universal fear for individuals regardless of socio-economic status, race, or religion. Because to me-home-invasion can encompass a spectrum of perpetrators, it could extend to an individual fearing those they are forced to inhabit a space with-knowing that “home” is not a safe space at all. Even the fear of those meant to “protect and serve” could justifiably be a different kind of guttural horror altogether.

A few newsletters back, you might remember I made some broad brush type “theologies” about motivations for why recent atrocities (in my opinion) have become disgustingly performative. This was not a callous attempt to explain away anything or a knee-jerk observation. On the contrary- it’s my very own intense repulsion to the fact that whether it be a mass shooting or a massacre by multiple knife-wielding assailants, it seems that those orchestrating and committing these acts are acting out their own depravity on a stage. Which again- unfathomably offensive because lives lost are not characters in a piece of fiction-I know this. These perpetrators do not.

So, imagine my reaction to reading just the first page of Michael J. Seidlinge Anybody Home?

It reads as a perpetrator's manifesto or “guide,” should I say; eerily echoing all the motivations and reasons why perpetrators look at what they do as art.

Below is the opening paragraph:

“WHAT ABOUT THE CAMERA? I’ll tell you how it all falls into place. I’ll tell you about the way you don’t ever really have complete control over the situation. I’ll go as far as to tell you how long it takes to wear one of them down. But you’re the one that’ll have to get used to the camera.”

Michael J. Seidlinge’s novel is meant to disturb/disgust and offend you. That’s why I like it. Also, it’s hard as fuck to write in 2nd person in a compelling way. The macabre and unflinching masterpiece of Anybody Home? will most assuredly keep you up at night.

Crush #4 & #5 are coming right up

XOXO-ME